Humor Quotes
Most popular humor quotes
Once you get people laughing, they're listening, and you can tell them almost anything.
Once you get them laughing and their mouths open, you can stuff anything in.
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
Brevity is the soul of wit.
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.
He who laughs, lasts.
Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of Humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.
Men show their character in nothing more clearly than by what they think laughable.
Humor is not a trick, not jokes. Humor is a presence in the world—like grace —and shines on everybody.
Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.
Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.
The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes.
Good humor may be said to be one of the very best articles of dress one can wear in society.
Among those whom I like, I can find no common denominator; but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make me laugh.
After God created the world, He made man and woman. Then, to keep the whole thing from collapsing, He invented humor.
Wit surprises, humor illuminates.
It always hurts a bit when you strike your funny bone. That's the essence of humor.
Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laugh is a humorist.
The love of truth lies at the root of much humor.
I think the next best thing to solving a problem is finding some humor in it.
Humor is a hole that lets the sawdust out of a stuffed shirt.
Humor is laughing at what you haven't got when you ought to have it.
A humorist is a fellow who realizes, first, that he is no better than anybody else, and, second, that nobody else is either.
Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end.
Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, it's unplanned, it's full of surprises.
Humor is a reminder that no matter how high the throne one sits on, one sits on one's bottom.
A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself.
A caricature is always true only for an instant.
Wit penetrates; humor envelops. Wit is a function of verbal intelligence; humor is imagination operating on good nature.
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can; all of them make me laugh.
Humor is what happens when we're told the truth quicker and more directly than we're used to.
Whatever you have read I have said is almost certainly untrue, except if it is funny, in which case I definitely said it.
Wit lives in the present, but genius survives the future.
Make us laugh and you can pick all pockets.
It is often a sign of wit not to show it, and not to see that others want it.
The man with the real sense of humor is the man who can put himself in the spectator's place and laugh at his own misfortunes.
Impropriety is the soul of wit.
Wit is the rarest quality to be met with among people of education.
There is nothing in which people more betray their character than in what they laugh at.
No mind is thoroughly well organized that is deficient in a sense of humor.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
You are not angry with people when you laugh at them. Humor teaches tolerance.
The man who sees the consistency in things is a wit— and a Calvinist. The man who sees the inconsistency in things is a humorist.
The man who can make others laugh secures more votes for a measure than the man who forces them to think.
You can read Kant by yourself, if you wanted to; but you must share a joke with someone else.
Humor is a painful thing told playfully.
The greatest advantage I know of being thought a wit by the world is, that it gives one the greater freedom of playing the fool.
Of puns it has been said that those who most dislike them are those who are least able to utter them.
I have never understood why it should be considered derogatory to the Creator to suppose that he has a sense of humour.
Good taste and humor are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.
Men will let you abuse them if only you will make them laugh.
Wit is so shining a quality that everybody admires it, most people aim at it, and all people fear it. Few love it unless in themselves.
A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit.
Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind.
We are in the world to laugh. In purgatory or in hell we shall no longer be able to do so. And in heaven it would not be proper.
Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter.
We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
If you don't learn to laugh at troubles, you won't have anything to laugh at when you grow old.
What I want to do is to make people laugh so that they'll see things seriously.
If you are not allowed to laugh in heaven, I don't want to go there.
Laughter is a form of internal jogging. It moves your internal organs around. It enhances respiration. It is an igniter of great expectations.
There are few who would not rather be hated than laughed at.
Laughter is by definition healthy.
The most wasted day of all is that on which we have not laughed.
It is well known that Beauty does not look with a good grace on the timid advances of Humor.
Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.
Among all kinds of writing, there is none in which authors are more apt to miscarry than in works of humor, as there is none in which they are more ambitious to excel.
Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots.
Humor tells you where the trouble is.
Humor is but another weapon against the universe.
Humor comes from self-confidence. There's an aggressive element to wit.
People ask what I am really trying to do with humor. The answer is, "I'm getting even."
Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
The difference between satire and humor is that the satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive—often to release him again for another chance.
Humor has a tremendous place in this sordid world. It's more than just a matter of laughing. If you can see things out of whack, then you can see how things can be in whack.
When they're offered to the world in merry guise, Unpleasant truths are swallowed with a will— For he who'd make his fellow-creatures wise Should always gild the philosophic pill!
Imagination is given to a man to console him for what he is not, as humor is given to him to console him for what he is. A man who has both is very near heaven already.
Humor is a rubber sword—it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
Humor is laughing at what you haven't got when you ought to have it . . . what you wish in your secret heart were not funny, but it is, and you must laugh. Humor is your own unconscious therapy.
How fatally the entire want of humor cripples the mind.
Humor is an antidote to isolation.
Humor is almost always anger with its makeup on.
Humor simultaneously wounds and heals, indicts and pardons, diminishes and enlarges; it constitutes inner growth at the expense of outer gain, and those who possess and honestly practice it make themselves more through a willingness to make themselves less.
Humor is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be.
Humor in its highest reach mingles with pathos: it voices sorrow for our human lot and reconciliation with it.
Humor is reason gone mad.
Humor is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs.
Humor is hope's companion in arms. It is not brash, it is not cheap, it is not heartless. Among other things I think humor is a shield, a weapon, a survival kit.
Humor is the shock absorber of life; it helps us take the blows.
Humor gives presidents the chance to be seen as warm, relaxed persons. Humor reaches out and puts its arm around the listener and says, "I am one of you, I understand," and implicitly it promises, "I will do something about your problems."
Wit is artificial; humor is natural. Wit is accidental; humor is inevitable. Wit is born of conscious effort; humor, of the allotted ironies of fate.
Humor is the affectionate communication of insight.
An emotional man may possess no humor, but a humorous man usually has deep pockets of emotion, sometimes tucked away or forgotten.
They sit on the edge of literature. In the house of Life they have the feeling that they have never taken off their overcoats. Afraid of losing themselves in the larger flight of the two-volume novel, or even the one-volume novel, they stick to short accounts of their misadventures because they never get so deep into them that they feel they can get out.
Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility.
Humor in a living culture must not be put away in the attic with the flag, but should be flaunted, like the flag, bravely.
Another instance of unconscious humor was of the Sunday school boy who defined a lie as "An abomination before the Lord and an ever present help in time of trouble."
Humor is not a mood but a way of looking at the world.
There is this difference between wit and humor: wit makes you think, humor makes you laugh.
Humor inspires sympathetic, good-natured laughter and is favored by the "healing power" gang. Wit goes for the jugular, not the jocular, and it's the opposite of football; instead of building character, it tears it down.
Humor is of the heart, and has its tears; but wit is of the head, and has only smiles—and the majority of those are bitter.
Don't try for wit. Settle for humor. You'll last longer.
Wit penetrates; humor envelops. Wit is a function of verbal intelligence; humor is imagination operating on good nature.
Humor wades across a brook, wit jumps over it.
Humor does not include sarcasm, invalid irony, sardonicism, or any other form of cruelty. When these things are raised to a high point they can become wit.
Wit and Humor—if any difference it is in duration—lightning and electric light. Same material, apparently; but one is vivid, brief, and can do damage—the other fools along and enjoys the elaboration.
Humour is laughing at what you haven't got when you ought to have it.
Humour distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.
Jokes cannot be jokes unless they are offensive somewhere.
