Wilson Mizner Quotes
Most popular Wilson Mizner Quotes

Poets are born, not paid.

Failure has gone to his head.

The sure way of getting nothing for something.

A trip through a sewer in a glass-bottomed boat.

The only sure thing about luck is that it will change.

Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton.

I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.

I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.
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Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.
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Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research.
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The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.
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In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch; Tact is the clever footwork.
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Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor-unassisted.

There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.

Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it just in time.

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he knows something.

If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.
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A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

When you take stuff from one writer, it's plagiarism; but when you take it from many writers it's research.

Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.